Little tired right now

This has been a week of nonsubstantive posting. But oftentimes, this blog ends up being my lowest priority.

Since I finished the novel around two months ago, I’ve gone through and made one revision pass on it and I’ve drafted eight new stories. That’s a really exciting level of productivity for me. But it’s also a little difficult for me to deal with.

At the beginning of this year I revised and submitted about 18 stories that were hanging over from last year, and have only done about 6 more revisions since then, meaning I have a huge backlog of things to revise. I am revising things here and there, but I’ve also been reading alot more, which means that I am getting more and more story ideas, and writing more stories. It’s all kind of a circus.

It’s hard to tell whether this sort of productivity is a happy thing. It can wreak havoc on the emotions. Every time I finish a story, I feel really good. Every time I get really into the groove on a story, I feel really good (that only lasts for about two days, per story, and then the damn thing’s finished). Every time I can’t make a story work, or sit down and write fifteen different openings and fool around for hours, I feel really good. Every time a story I’ve recently revised and submitted (i.e. one which has not been rejected too often) is held a long time somewhere (by now I have a pretty good idea, from response times, when a story is being passed up the editorial ladder for further consideration), I feel really good. And when it’s rejected, I feel not so good.

And that can all get to be a bit much at times. Sometimes the interplay of emotions means I just spend a few hours staring at my submissions spreadsheet, doing nothing. And that’s the time I would ordinarily use for blogging.

(Oh, and when I sell a story it feels pretty good too…but that doesn’t happen that often, I’m at 5 sales and 98 rejections for this year, and this is my best year ever.)

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  1. David

    Keep trying to share your gift. When you have strong enough opinions about something you are doing that you admit that you have emotions, then you probably aren’t wasting your time. Anyway, if you ever are writer’s blocked I can sell you some ideas for stories.

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